The Habitual Poet: Michelle Estile

Installment #28

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The Habitual Poet is an ongoing series of contributor interviews. If you are a Poemeleon contributor and would like to participate download the questions, input your answers, and e-mail it to: editor@poemeleon.org.

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Reading

Q: Where do you prefer to get your books?

A: I am a fan of Jackson Street Books in Athens, but I’m also guilty of online shopping. As an “outside borrower” I can check out five books at a time from the local university library. Only five.

Q: How many poetry books do you think you own, and what percentage of these have you actually read?

A: Somewhere in the 70s for single-author volumes, maybe a dozen or so anthologies. As for percentage, I don’t do math, but I tend to tear through the smaller volumes quickly then obsessively read my favorites. Otherwise, I’m a “nibbler” with five or six books going at once.

Q: When, where and how do you usually read? (i.e. at bedtime under the covers, cover to cover, etc.)

A: Before bed, on lunch breaks, at the botanical gardens.

Q: What books of poetry have you read this month?

A: Claudia Emerson’s Figure Studies, Louse Erdrich’s Baptism of Desire, C.D. Wright’s Translation of the Gospel Back into Tongues  (my favorite book title).

Q: What other books/magazines/backs of cereal boxes have you read recently?

A: The tenth anniversary issue of Tin House, the latest The Pinch, the Flannery O’ Connor bio by Gooch, old issues of Oxford American.

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Writing

Q: When, where, how do you write, and why?(i.e. at dusk on a dock, longhand in a notebook, because...)

A: Whenever, wherever. I keep a little notebook with me to catch fragments. Working fulltime, I try to write any chance I get. For some reason it’s easier to write drafts in the a.m. hours and do revisions at night. If I get stuck, I write lists, or cluster-writing.

Q: How many first drafts do you think you complete in a week? A month?

A: There’s no telling. It depends on how stressful work has been, the phase of the moon, sleep patterns, the number of sacrifices given to the poetry gods (my cat Maggie is in charge of this).

Q: How long do you wait before revising a poem?

A: I try to always wait at least a week before I start tinkering with a poem. Others “age” for several weeks or months before I take them out. If a poem feels like a favored child, I leave it alone for a long time. Even that doesn’t help all of the time.

Q: When do you know a poem is “done”?

A: Kevin Young talked about having his poems on the painter Basquiat displayed on a wall for an exhibit. He said it really made him think about each writing decision. That image is a good litmus test…to imagine it in large print on a wall and my confidence in each word or line break.

Q: Have you ever given up an invitation so you could stay home and write?

A: Sure, but I’ll decline giving further details because I do like invitations.

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Publishing

Q: What is your system for sending out work?

A: Sporadic bouts of all or nothing. Most recent episode, all.

Q: What have you more recently received: a rejection notice or an acceptance? Was it what you expected?

A: A rejection. I would love to have a Zen-like detachment to the outcome of submissions, but that’s not so.

Q: Where do you generally publish: online, in print, or a mix, and do you have a preference?

A: So far I have published online, which makes sharing my work with friends and family easier. I hope to break into paper/print this year for variety’s sake.

Q: What is the worst (or weirdest, or best) experience you’ve had with a journal/magazine/press & its editor(s)? (No names, please!)

A: No horror stories for me, yet. Honestly, I have been so pleased with the generosity of editors to send feedback with rejections. That is always encouraging, especially considering the amount of work they must read.

Q: Have you ever received any fan (or hate) mail? If so, what was that like?

A: I got an amazing email from a poet and writing professor after a friend sent him some of my poems. He said some very encouraging things about my work, and the kicker was the subject line—“A Fan Letter.” I keep that with a note from a coworker that simply says, “We know you can write.” Every poet should have their fans, their cheerleaders.

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Practical considerations

Q: What is your day job, and how does it affect your writing?

A: I am a therapist in Athens, Georgia. The skills of observation, empathy, and clarity serve either role of counselor or writer. Both jobs require a lot of emotional and mental energy which requires a great deal of balance. Most of my counseling work is with the music community (with a smattering of other creative types). Artists, writers, and musicians are called to go to the edges of human experience, which can very dark and heavy. The trick is to come back to report. That’s good to remember both as a counselor and as a writer.

Q: How does your significant other’s occupation affect your writing life?

A: He’s an IT guy so there’s not much overlap, although I have put in a request for him to design a better submissions tracking program.

Q: Have there been periods in your life when you couldn't write?

A: There have been fallow periods, but when I am not writing poems or prose I tend to journal more. Or write more letters (which I miss, real, paper letters).

Q: Do you have a “poetry budget”?

A: Not explicitly, no. Excellent idea, though.

Q: Have you ever suffered (or made someone else suffer) in the name of your art? (i.e. picked up your kids late from school so you could finish a poem, forgone lunch to buy a book, left a relationship because the other person just didn't understand, etc.)

A: I prefer the word sacrifice to suffer, and yes, some relationship time has been sacrificed to writing time. Also, I chose a week at a writer’s workshop over a trip with my husband for my 40^th birthday. It shows his commitment to my work that he understood that.

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Random nonsense

Q: Do you have any superhuman abilities? (i.e. can you tie a cherry stem in a knot with your tongue, or write a double sestina with both hands tied behind your back?)

A: My superhero power is Worst Case Scenario Vision.

Q: You write a scathing poem about your mother and she learns about it. You:

a.) Move to South America and leave no forwarding address

b.) Delete the poem and insist it never existed

c.) Show it to her (she’s already written you out of the will anyway)

d.) Do none of the above; instead you: _____

A: Immediately write a laudatory poem in her honor.

Q: If the best medical specialists in the world told you that if you didn’t give up your poetry habit today you would die in six months, would you get your affairs in order or would you leave that up to your family?

A: Switch to the lyric essay or microfiction.

Q: If you could be a vowel, which one would you be and why?

A: The y, to keep my options open, and because I’m curious.

Q: Finally write a couplet for a collaborative ghazal using the following kaafiyaa and radif: “said the poet”.

A: “I am sick as a dog. I am done for,” said the poet

“Be still, be quiet,” said the doctor that bled the poet.

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Michelle Estile, has worked as a tomato picker, a music teacher, bookstore clerk, and saxophonist. She enjoys her current work incarnation as a counseling social worker in Athens, GA. She lives in nearby Watkinsville where her many lives inform her writing. Her work has appeared in Six Little Things, Umbrella, and The Dead Mule School of Southern Literature. She is currently finishing her first chapbook, The Desire Line.